I remember...

I don't even know where to start right now its been a almost 4months since I have stop and just blogged. So much has happen within those 4months! I guess I am just going to try and talk about whatever I can remember...


School...well....I just had the worse semester of my life! It was everything I wanted it not to be, but the overall outcome of the semester was great! Being a new student is not fun at all! Having to have to get us to a new surrounding wasn't fun! I would have to say that it is all growing on me right now I am not in love with it right now but I am learning to enjoy every moment of it. I have learned that I have to overcome all the thoughts going on in my head and just go for things! On the academic side of school I would have to say I did well or as my transcript says I am in "Good Standing" hahah! I just hope it gets better from here. I have also decided to do a minor! What is it you ask, Environmental Geology... I love it, my lecture and lab teachers made my love this. I could tell that it was their passion and in seeing that I have made it mine, I really enjoy the information and all of the great stuff! Even though science is not my thing I have come to LOVE Environmental Geology! School on a more personal level... I have had sooo many umm what is the word that i am looking for "breakdowns" that is what we will call it.. Like I said this has been the worse semester of my life, and there have been some crazy not so good nights and looking back on them now I have learned from them! I am hoping to be a stronger person as it just gets harder.

Also i have learned some new things about myself and I wasn't going to blog about it but hey I am about to become an open book right now....Well this information to me isn't really new so to say, I guess I have always known school to be hard for me and I finally got some answers. This last semester i did some testing that lasted forever!!!!! 8:30am to 3pm with a 45min lunch break FOREVER! Well anyway, after taking these test and waiting a month for the results I went back to the psychologist to her my results and let me just say sitting there listening to the results made me want to just live under a rock. Most of the information was not new to me but some things were. If I had to put it all in my own words it would come to... I shouldn't be sitting in a classroom in college. Yea that is very harsh but that is what should have been said. Like i said those are my own words the psychologist didn't say them. My test scores were low in some areas that they shouldn't be and I am now fine with that. Some of the questions that were going through my head... What am i going to do with my life now, how am i going to make it to graduation, and many more. Then i just stopped and remember that i have gotten this far and there is no turning back now. I remember telling myself that I will not let these results form me into something that I am not. I will now us this as an example for people who may have these same results if not lower or around. I want to be an example now I want to be able to be that support of those who want to just give up I want to be so much more then those questions that were going on in my head.

There is not much more to talk about cause school has been my life these last months... I look back on these months and now that I have changed. I know for a fact that i am not the same person from move in day. I am trying new things and meeting people and over all God is showing me a lot in life. He is rocking my world and testing me just as I prayed and I remember blogging on the 23 of December and being lost and picking where to go to school I remember ending by writing "Out of all the praying and hoping and thinking, I am finding myself to come closer and closer to God. I am seeing God rock my world and all of the great things He has done for me. I see how great of a God I serve! Back to praying I go..." Even now God is rocking my world and I am seeking Him more and more. Over this semester in all of the craziness I have been able to spend time with God and really trying to find meaning to what does it really mean to love the people around you. I have spending my time asking Him what does it really mean to break your heart for the people around you. I truly don't know what it means but He is teaching me sooo much. One major thing He is teaching me is to serve the people around me to have a heart of thanksgiving.

Even though that didn't really sum up everything that happen in these last months. I know that it sums up most of it. I hope to be able to blog more this next semester even though i am taking on more class then the last semester!

Happy Holidays to everyone!

(I just wanted to end in some text of my old blogs, if you want more you can click on the text and read the blog)

"we have to go and befriend everyone"

"patience"

"to be continued"

"Come seek me first"

"its ok i can handle this"

"whats yet to come.."

"everything i have on my... and give it all up"

"white flag up and surrender"

"all of those what ifs"